I can't believe we are already in November!!! It's almost been a month since I have posted! I started a post about 2 weeks ago and while I was typing the phone rang and I sat my laptop down and I have been running ever since! Not good! I have so much to fill you in on but it won't all be in this post. So much has happened in the last month and I need to share. However, not in this post. I feel led to go in a different direction even as I write.
It will grow if you feed it but if you starve it, it will die. Yes!! lol....this is a riddle. Now replace the word "IT" with any word you choose and it will be true. I chose to add "MY LOVE" will grow if I feed it but if I starve it, my love will die. I use these words in reference to my marriage and my husband. My husband and I had children early and we did not get to spend alot of "alone" time. It seems the kids have ALWAYS been here. We have often focused so much on their wants and their needs that we had neglected to feed our marriage. At times our marriage has been on life support from pure deprivation and neglect. We had to find ways to pump life back into the heart of our marriage. For you it may not be kids, it could be many other things that require your attention. Life will sure throw you enough curve balls to keep you batting at something. My husband and I have learned something in the past 15 years and we hope that you can take some of these tips to revive your marriage or keep it burning.
Lesson #1 .. No matter what, you and your spouse are the team! No one else can join the team but God. Anybody else is a 3rd party. They can watch you play but they have to sit on the sidelines.
Lesson #2.. We are always evolving and changing. Understanding that we have to keep learning our spouse is important. Thinking we have them pegged makes us get comfortable and can cause us to be negligent.
Lesson #3.. GIVE EACH OTHER SOME SPACE!! A little "me" time is ok.
Lesson #4.. Try your best to be fit and healthy and keep yourself up. This goes both ways. Your husband married a woman and that's what he intends to see everyday. This goes for you men as well. Keep yourselves up.
Lesson #5.. NEVER stop dating each other. This is probably the hardest. We have friends that have a regular date night every week. Lol... we are so not there, but would love to get there at least 2x a month. Dress up and go out and spend quality time with each other. It doesn't have to cost alot. Grab ice cream or a midday movie. Or if money is not a issue, splurge.. plan a romantic evening with your spouse. Make all the plans and tell them to just show up! Check out D$D.. they always have ways to save and you may find ways to get a date night for FREE!!!
Lesson #6.. Laugh as much as you can!! Laugh Laugh laugh!! Life has enough serious moments that we need to inject as much laughter as possible.
Lesson #7...... THERE IS NO "B" Plan. Our marriage has no other option but to work because their is no other alternative. People leave the option for the "D" word on the table. Take it off! Make a commitment to talk and talk and talk and talk and talk..... you get the point.
Your spouse is your witness in this life. They are observing your growth and development all the way. They can verify that you were here and you lived this life. They should be your greatest cheerleader and be a place of comfort. If you are struggling in your marriage, I swear you can make it! It can and will get better if you guys commit to make it work. There are sweet rewards along the way if you hang in there. If all is well.. Keep up the good work! Remember in this life there are few do overs. Live purposefully and intentionally.
